Even More Ways to Bugger the Death Note characters
by Lawliet Loves Light
Summary: heee


**Even More Ways to Bugger Death Note Characters**

_____________________________________________________________________________________

**L**

1.) Boil his ice-cream

2.) Hide in his closet and when he opens it, start air-humping him.

3.) Knock him unconscious, putting him in a crate and pushing it down a waterfall.

4.) Emerge from under his bed after he takes a shower saying "I'ma gonna getchu!"

5.) Make hot love to his cake.

6.) Every time he gets depressed, Using a brick- repeatedly whack him into a pulp.

7.) Squeeze out his guts and make tasty L Juice, distributing cups of it to random people.

8.) Strap him to a chair making him watch reruns of Legend of Zelda

9.) Make him look purty for his date with Roger

10.) Make a nest in his hair saying,

**"I CLAIM THIS PLANET IN THE NAME OF ED!"**

_"Bringer of bacon."_

**Light**

11.) **"YOU CALL THAT SWIMMING?? YOU SLOW PIECE OF SHIT!"** Start chasing him around while waving your arms around trying to teach him the proper way of swimming.

12.) Tell Matt that Light called him his dirty little secret.

13.) Tell Mogi that Light called him his dirty little secret.

14.) Tell Watari that Light called him his dirty little secret.

15.) Hide in his cupboard and hug his potato chips bag closely, telling it that the creepy potato chip molester will not come again as long as you're around D

16.) Show him the joys of therapy.

17.) Milk a snake and inject the venom into his cereal- stating that milk makes strong Kira bones _no matter where it comes from._

18.) While eating cereal with him [you threatened to put that one video of him up on the web], scream out : **"He's after me lucky charms!"**

19.) Pat his head seductively, and call him your Little Kira.

20.) March over to his apartment and inform him that there is a Mikami in his fridge that wishes to eat him.

**Mello**

21.) Reunite him with Matt, and then reveal Linda who was standing shyly behind you stating that they're getting hitched.

22.) Take advantage of his exposed belly, and crawl into his belly button, exploring the wonders that lie within.

23.) Take pictures of the mole-people that reside inside his belly button.

24.) Befriend the mole-people.

25.) Turn them against him.

26.) Come frolicking towards him claiming you haveta beat the gay outta him.

27.) [Matt of course faked his own death- he hid in the trunk of the car while his own- well you know BB and L? Not twin- but lookalike sacrificed himself for Matty.] While Mello is having his heart attack, come marching over hanging on Matt's arm saying "AHURHURHUR GUESS YOU LUCKED OUT MARSHMELLO, MATT AND I ARE GOING TO MAKE OUR OWN AWASUM BAND AND LIVE HAPPY, RICH, AND FAMOUS LIVES AND YOU'RE NOT INVITED!" Matt of course, will ignore this whole situation while bashing some Bowzers on his Gameboy.

28.) Make a depressing rap song about his life.

29.) Dress up as an old fart and stalk him saying that you're gonna hunt down that young hooligan.

30.) Dress his chocolate up in pretty little outfits, each unique in their own special way.

**Near**

31.) Line his dice up to say "YER GONNA GET YER ASS RAPED CHIELD."

32.) Drag him to the store to buy him a mood ring.

33.) Lubricate all his toys so that he won't be able to pick them up.

34.) Wrap him up into a cocoon, whether he likes it or not, and watch as he develops into a beautiful Nearosaurus.

35.) When he stands up, gasp and yell "**THIS IS MUTINY!**"

36.) Watch in amazement as Kool-Aid man smashes through the wall saying "**NO. THIS. IS. SPARTAAA!**"

37.) Become a master of puppetry and have little puppet Kiras follow him around on a daily basis.

38.) He will, of course, ignore them at first, but then throw them at him, tangling him up and tying him to a chair making him listen to your rants about how he's just not committed enough in this relationship.

39.) Lock him in a small room, escorting pedophiliacs into the room.

40.) Once again dress up as an old fart and nag him all day, trying to teach him proper etiquette.


End file.
